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I started figuring out treats to do with the kids: Dairy Queen on the first spring day you can go without a coat, donuts on the first and last day of school, etc. a few years ago and the joy

of not having to think about nutrition and just have fun with the kids is so amazing. Not that it’s all good, but, like you in this story, it is the food that stands out. “Unearned” is a

word that resonates with me for this action. We invite my husband for these fun things, though usually he can’t come. My dad did Sunday donuts and the only McDonalds I ever got were when he

had to feed us. In my mind my mom is still associated with having to eat my vegetables and awful boiled chicken. She deserves more of the fun, too expensive food memories. As I’ve grown and

had to take on the same role, it has come to feel more and more like he stole something from her in being the “fun” dad, especially when I think about how the only time it meant he spent

with us was ten minutes in a car.